Celebrator (i.e. Birthday-ee) must select restaurant for dinner. Note–not “can” select the restaurant, but “must” select the restaurant.- Celebrator can select type of cake; this is not a “must;” if this choice is deferred, it’s Mom’s choice. ‘Cause it’s her damn ass running around producing the mothe-fuckin’ cake to begin with. So you could get a regular cake, a low-carb cake, a cheesecake or a tray of $3 chocolate cupcakes with soccer rings in ‘em from Dillions. Whatever.
- Presents come around dinner time. Presents are a family activity. Family may taunt celebrator about how amazingly wonderful the presents are throughout the day on the birthday. This is great fun.
- Celebrator can invite a date. Date will ideally be present at dinner. Date may not make disturbing sexual innuendo in front of other family members–we’re eating, for Christ’s sakes. Date may not speak in a fake British accent, either. Really. ‘Cause it sounds retarded, man.
- It’s a free for all on the cake, except the last piece goes to the Celebrator. ‘Cause it was their damn birthday, man. It’s there damn birthday.
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